为什么真诚对待朋友，
回报的却是背叛？！

是谁说朋友多有好处？
错了！！

朋友的却对我的影响很大，
曾经背叛过我的是朋友、
给予我欢乐笑声是朋友、
曾经帮过我的是朋友、
难过时安慰我的还是朋友、
就连让我失去对人信任的也是朋友。
是"朋友""教"会我很多东西。

我至今天才知道原来朋友是拿来利用的！
利用我时，什么好话、马屁都说得出、拍出来。
当自己没利用价值后马上把我扔到远远的。
不知是我愚蠢，还是无知！
一而再，再而三的被她利用！
为什么"受伤"后的我依然那么仁慈？！

不只这样，还被她出卖、背叛了无数次。
她却把我的好心帮忙当成理所当然的。
她说一套、做一套，口不对心！
说话不算数，她的理由我真的听腻了！
很想对她说："来点新鲜的Ley!听到臭酸了啦！"

当她需要我的帮忙时，就办可怜、耍性格。
不理她呢？就夺命连环call我。
但我需要她时，就只是敷衍、敷衍再敷衍(fu yan)。
夺命连环call她时，却挂电话、找白痴的理由。

把小人当知己对待，我真的有眼无珠！
话说得没错："害人之心不可有，防人之心不可无！"
& "人不为己，天诛地灭！"
人心隔肚皮、至今才发现人心是如此的险恶。

还有向我借钱时，我宁愿少花一点也会借她。
又借却没环还没让我那么气。
当我向她借点钱时，却跟我装穷、跟我比穷。
"A!拜托我才是真的穷人家的小孩好吗!"
可能我的小钱很计较是跟你学的吧！

"朋友啊！朋友啊！
到底哪个才是真真的你？
我真的分不清你何时带着假面具！"
老实说我很佩服她，我真的甘拜下风！
I服了YOU!

我再也不会对朋友真心真意了！
我不会是从前那个讲仪气的王慧琦了！
现在的我只有把自己当刺猬，
才能不再让自己受伤。
不只对朋友，对其他人事物也不例外。

也许是因为一个"忍"字，让我憋到如今吧！
"忍"，让我改变了不少。
它的的却却让我改变了我的火爆脾气。
或许是忍让我变得仁慈。

所以从今以后我会做回自己！
那个有话直说、有屁直骂、
有恩报恩、有仇必报真实的我。
坚持"人不犯我、我不犯人，
人若犯我、我必犯人。"&
"你敬我一尺，我敬你一丈!"的原则。

"阿婆走得快，一定有古怪！"
明白了这个道理，我会很小心了。
我会学习如何"快刀斩乱麻"！
相信一个人的我依然会微笑。

Labels: 无声呐喊 silent scream

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有很多话想说，但却不能说也不想说。
有很多事想做，但却没资格完成。
有很多梦想，但却不敢想。

一句无心的话可能伤了她人的心。
其实我不怪她，因为她什么都不知道。
她对我的事一概不知，也不可能明白我的处境。
我怪的只是我所承受的不公平。
我只能自己独自忍受，无法与他人"分享"。

或许该是时候我沉静在拼图堆中了吧！
把每句想说的话拼在一块。
对着拼图说总比把心事告诉"朋友"来得安全。
因为拼图不会出卖我，它不会把我的事说出去。
"朋友"不敢保证。见过鬼还不怕黑吗？

Alot of words want to said, but can't and don't want to say.
Alot of things want to do, but no rights to fulfill.
Alot of dreams, but don't dare to think and dream.

words doesn't mean it may hurt someone heart.
actually i did not blame her at all, as she don't know anything everything.
she don't know my problem at all, she doesn't understood my situation.
i only blaming unfairness treated to me.
nothing i can do other than tolerate it.

Maybe its time to let me live in peace in the juzza puzzles!
join every words that i want to said together.
talking to puzzle is safter than telling my secret to friends.
As it won't betray me, they won't said out.
friends? i don't dare to comfirm they won't said out if i tell them.
"seen ghost before still not scared of dark meh?"

Labels: 无声呐喊 silent scream

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最近常常向东想西、想些有的没的，其中就有想结束生命的念头那就不用烦恼那么多了。但是很多理由让我不去自杀。

首先就是钱的问题，没钱不只不能过活甚至不能死。因为没钱买棺材、扮伤逝、还有服务费、gst、火化或土张、金银纸等都要花钱。更多详情火化比土张来得更便宜，还有在新加坡土张限定15年。

第二是现在什么都涨涨涨，木料也不例外。所以等到价格掉才死还不迟。

第三就是保险问题，不只没钱买保险，即使买了保险死后都不知道家人得到保险金吗咯。AIA要倒又不倒。

其次，如果男性自杀死不死都得被鞭行，女性自杀死不了还要坐牢，男性也一样。

下来是我个人问题，我家组屋翻新电梯那里有位扮伤逝？

最后，火化会导致空气污染、全球暖化，而土张会浪费土地资源。

所以咯，奉劝破产人士不要这样笨去自杀！虽然若死后没烦恼,但受苦的是家人，要计划好才死咯！还有自杀领不到保险金，意外死才有保险金，知道该怎么死了吧？别忘了先买保险才去极乐世界。

P.S 不要误会，我不是在教他人如何死法。生命是宝贵的，请学着好好的珍惜！

recently a lot of thing floating in my mind, one of it was an idea to end my life so that no need to trouble so much...BUT reasons remind me not to commit suicide.

Firstly was money problem, not only no money can't live instead no money also can't die. Because no money buy coffin, whole funeral, still got services charge,gst, cremation(burn) or bury, the joss stick and paper all need money. for more info cremation will be cheap than bury, and in Singapore bury got limited period of 15yrs.

Secondly now everything also expensive, wood the price also expensive. wait till price drop still not late..

thirdly insurance problem, not only no money buy insurance somemore you see AIA want fall don't want fall.. also don't know after die can collect money a not?

fourthly for male commit suicide still need canning, but if never die will jailed for both male and female.

fifthly for me, my block area now renovating lifts where got space for funeral?

lastly, cremation cause air pollution then global warming, and bury waste land use.

So people who bankrupt don't be so stupid go commit suicide! if die no more worry, but family will suffer, plan properly then die. and commit suicide can't claim insurance, accident then can claim. so should know how to die? and remember to buy insurance then leave the world.

P.S i didn't mean to teach people how to die, don't mistaken. LIFE IS PRECIOUS, PLEASE LEARN TO TREASURE IT!

*this post is base on Chinese Buddhist.

Labels: 无声呐喊 silent scream

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Sunday(23/11/08)
ITS so boring!! not outing, staying at home zuobo(do nth), eat sleep eat sleep.. really boring, actually went to esplanade to watch first light(a show about life and death) and Expo for JJparty3 but end up never..

simply just don't want to stay at home, maybe bored??? after woke up at 12.30pm went bath, eat brunch went to sleep because i want to ignore everything and anything..

P.S-> Don't ask me for jobs anymore... due to some reasons i missed few great jobs. don't ask why! just simply stop asking. i don't want to be kind-hearted person anymore. really don't worth to be kind person.

Labels: "bloody sunday", boring day

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woke up at 10am, then did this and that. 12.30pm went to CWP took straightener from ruxiu, and headed to agnes house took poster then slack and drink ice-water.

while walking home i almost got bang by a reckless lorry(driver)...reached home, who knows jas called so went back to breadtalk collect thing from alicia.

went home straight went to shower as its really hot afternoon. suddenly heavy rain, and JenniferHeng called me as her house jump electricity lucky mummy was around so she went. 4.30pm rushed out to met BeeCheng to go mediacorp.

reached there jas, alicia and their friend celest were there. waited very long then went to studio instead of theatre, as there full dress rehearsal for tomorrow anniversary GALA .

kimNg heels super high got about 5inch! she is as tall as DesmondKoh and "ah-niu liang yi qing" very funny, hahax. found someone who English is as lousy as mine...hehex

during the sing siong show, kept receiving msg(s) , from HuiChen, then JenniferHeng and JasmineYeo, and other 2 was jeff friend.. i shocked by JasmineYeo msg as i tht JasmineHeng pranked me...LOL, as she just sat beside me.

JJ sang and dance 不潮不用花钱, & sang wrong hahax。。。otw back alot of thing float through my mind.. mood totally changed...

Labels: JJ event

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Wednesday(19/11/08)
woke up at 1+, after bath and had brunch went to jas house.. dillydally till 3.30pm headed mediacorp. its raining, reach there was wet, collected only 1 item and another 2 got some problem. cabbed to bishan to subway eat fresh.

went home and mum cook chicken rice for dinner, yummy! then help jasmine to download song, and till morning then found the Chinese vision one..


Thursday(20/11/08)
Happy birthday to Cindy

slept in morning and woke up at noon, & 3 person disturbed me sleeping, first was bun, if i not wrong she call me go Escape. then was alicia! she prank call me! ask me go take PSLE result, LOL. and next was jasmine came my house forgotten do what.

**currently now still a 无业游民(jobless),some friend should know why. haiix, just don't wish to said here as i really don't wish to have conflicts again. im really tiring on conflicts among people, its really boring.... 好人难做啊！是谁说好心有好报的？？真是白痴！

**i really got to work!! no job, no money, no mood, no energy!! im hunger for money!! really irritating!!!
~!@#$%^&*&^%$#@!~!!! how i wish money can drop from sky!! LOL.

Labels: boring days

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Monday(17/11/08)
crazily searching over the house for my mum thing, end up i escaped to jasmine house to hide.. But still surrender back home.

Tuesday(18/11/08)
actually going to mediacorp but due to alicia i changed time to collect thing. night went to center kfc, then to alicia house. otw back home really got dogs follow me...

and now got cats fighting outside my house... irritating!! cats & dogs!! OMG!!

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My nails
me, frenda and fredrick
mingxiu,xinyi and me.my face look weird


Alicia(the hyper one) and me
me and anesha(quite girl)
candy(fierce girl...oops sorry) and me
me and cindy(cca junior)
me and dewen
me and faraha..hahaha
me and frenda(blur queen)
grace(chicken) and me
Janice(the crazy one) and me
me and jasmine(the chicken hand duck leg)
joelle(gentle one) and me
me and mages(the caring one)...where im i looking??
shishz(my good listener) and me
sixian(the nagging one) and me
me and Vanessa(the understanding one)
Vanessa took my phone zi lian..

5A
my look weird..
smile =)
what im i looking?

Labels: photos

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Finally im free!

12 Nov 2008
woke up at 2pm after brunch and bath-ed start making my dress,end up my mum said she do because i do very slow do until next still undone. This is what she said to me: "you better don't tell people you my daughter ah! cut the cloth also cut until not straight, & somemore got line to line you!"

she added on.. "1 more step also want to save, you really lazy ley! Wapang!" [as should do top and bottom then join, but due to my laziness i did not seperate top and bottom endup become pregnant woman dress(孕妇装)]

night went CWP with jas to buy shawls, but no cheap one... went home, and the dress was done.
**she really is super mummy la!! not only her cooking skills good, dress also know, somemore is i cutted till like "shit" de cloth!..


13 Nov 2008
WDL Graduation/Prom night 2008

3am took my tools box and supper went jasmine house sent her supper & help her do her nails, and then fallen asleep at house..12pm went home eat brunch, bath, dry my hair and stating to do my nails. end-up got smach, now i agreed my mum said one, "wait until want to do big business(shit) then go dig hole![1*]"

no choice, then quickly took my make-up-kit to jas house. do my make up, and was about to be late so never put eyelash and make hair... before going, jason(jas's kor) said to jas: "Ee-ey! like ghost!!"

reached school at 5pm, haiiya, can't go in cause i didn't sign up. so waited till 5.30pm, ms ang let me go up but term and conditions apply. must eat the food, and take doorgift. sad, ms ang laugh at my english...-_-

took alot of photos~~

after prom night, at bus-stop very angried, then went party world, yeah!! & fredrick flipped water and kana my heel. anyway thanks hong!pay you back asap..

reach home 1.30am bathed and eat my supper curry chicken, although alot of sause and potatos and few piece of chicken but still very yummy...

its 2.30am, still can't sleep must clean my heel, all thanks to fredrick... and clear up the mess in my room..


14 Nov 2008
Flipping over my house looking for my mum things, haiix she forgotten where she placed.. so on the other hand clear the mess in my house since long time ago...


15 Nov 2008
Happy birthday to Lawrence Heng..

will continue do house cleaning after blogging..&& now im eating mee hoon gui made by my mum..yummy

**[1*]because olden days in kampong no toilet bowl so want to do big business must dig hole early early...then can do the business..

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CHEERS!!!
O-level finally over!!

NO more words
NO more graphs
NO more numbers
NO more alphabets
NO more Formulas
NO more diagrams
NO more stressful exams
NO more unknown questions

Moreover...
YES fun
YES blogging
YES slacking
YES craziness
YES happiness
YES peaceful mind

But..
Life still going on
Tiring still going on
Nagging still going on
Moneyless still going on
Loneliness still going on
Stressful life still going on
Silent screams still will be go on

shall celebrate!!
but no money!!
Haiiya!!!
chionging for money soon!!
Hope for MORE high pay jobs.
&& then shopping, eating, shopping, eating.. YEAH!

yesterday was POA paper, and i was so blur! i went to study science && i woke up at 9am & thought i late!! lucky POA P1 start at 2pm. anyway i feel weird POA & Science mcq both i used 50mins to finish, broke record, and my science i used 20mins for phy and 30mins for chem, first time!!

afternoon went woodlands center with jasmine to buy things. then she treat me eat "mee hon gui", so i treat her sugar cane drink. anyway thank you jasmine!! And walked home, saw sinyong and boonkiat again! 3times!! suay!!...

sad, angry, and unhappy!! haiix, shall not mention..

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曲名：一个人的我依然会微笑
歌手：林佳仪
专辑：一个人的我依然会微笑


如果想哭我自己会找地方
你不必担心我会弄湿你肩膀
走在街上到处是寂寞的人　
我想谁都不要 同情的眼光
受一点伤并不是可怕的事　
人就是这样才会愈来愈坚强
谁叫男人永远比女人清楚　
爱情它何时该收何时该放
你走吧　我不哭　无论多痛苦
你走吧　我不哭　就算会迷路
明天一个人的我依然会微笑　
虽然它或许也是伤心的开始
爱情的轮回总是一次又一次　
是悲是喜终将都变成往事
明天一个人的我依然会微笑　
那怕早已没有人记得我名字
别问我为何执迷不悟的尝试　
女人生来就多这么一点痴

如果想哭我自己会找地方
你不必担心我会弄湿你肩膀
走在街上到处是寂寞的人　
我想谁都不要 同情的眼光
受一点伤并不是可怕的事　
人就是这样才会愈来愈坚强
谁叫男人永远比女人清楚　
爱情它何时该收何时该放
你走吧　我不哭　无论多痛苦
你走吧　我不哭　就算会迷路
明天一个人的我依然会微笑　
虽然它或许也是伤心的开始
爱情的轮回总是一次又一次　
是悲是喜终将都变成往事
明天一个人的我依然会微笑　
那怕早已没有人记得我名字
别问我为何执迷不悟的尝试　
女人生来就多这么一点痴

明天一个人的我依然会微笑　
那怕早已没有人记得我名字
别问我为何执迷不悟的尝试　
女人生来就多这么一点痴

Labels: lyric, song

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Planning for year ended 2008 and beginning 2009!~Short-term goals!

1) changing a new spectacle, probably is red in colour. As me and my another 3 cousins planning to change same colour spec before LNY 2009.

2) Earning my first $2000/month income.

3) Do something to my hair.

4) KL trip to visit jonathan lin and ah-yao. And there of course to shopping..

5) Sponsor daddy, mummy on Penang trip LNY 2009.

6) Make over my room.

7) Buy everything i want without thinking about money. / worriedless of money problem.


Long-term goals!
1) Done all Unfulfilled one before i leaving this world...

2) Starting my own business with my cousins. [wanna know? i don't tell you=)] -> only close friend know.

3) Successful Business woman

4) Useful person

5) Allow my daddy and mummy retired in less than 2 years time.

6) Car driving license and own a car.

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finally changed my blog skin!! so tiring creating a the blog skin. Asking why is black and mostly in red?
Ans: my life seem a bit black, and red very striking good to eyes.
And also added a new song which i really like it, and meaningful too.

Anyway recently found a few jobs, but mostly they need a RESUME! i don't know how to write, so thankful the people reminded me to ask teacher. And Mrs lee helped me for my resume, however i still not very sure on how to write a resume.

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Happy belated birthday to bear junxiong and prawn xiali. (2/11/08)

Having O-level.... mood less to study! due to some personal reasons..

anyway looking for jobs, and had found various which had high pay. part-time and full-time, actually i was thinking to work 2 part-time but the time unable to manage..

few days ago, in the middle of the night... i... step on lizard!! super unlucky!
Here the tails.
warning!!

Below image might be awful, children and pregnant women, for your own safety please close my blog.
*if you shocked and death, then sorry no insurance pay to you..
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